A Freshwoman has solved the Problems of Memphis!

I recently read a blog about the current conditions of Memphis, specifically, Whitehaven. I agree that Memphis does need a drastic change to morph into the city that it has the potential to be. When I tell foreigners that I am from Memphis, they immediately become excited and ask a thousand questions about the historical past that we are apparently known for. I had to ask myself, "Have Memphians lost the passion that we were once known for?" I mean really. We have been labeled with the complements of having the best barbecue, the home of the blues, home of legends such as Isaac Hayes, Elvis Presley, and so many others. We hold the place in history where Dr. Marin Luther King Jr. was assassinated. Those are just a few of the historical advantages that we hold, and we have lost all appreciation for them. I laugh at the Memphians who have lived here for decades, and still have not visited the Black History Museum, or Graceland. What fools to have historical landmarks at your fingertips and not savor them? Instead of grasping these valuable assets, we have completely trashed Memphis like it was never a thought to anyone. The constant crime, littering, and con artists have turned this place up side down. Instead of a place of beauty and history, it is a place of chaos. Why can't we do anything about it? Instead of leaving that bottle on the stairs, just keep it until you past the garbage can that is waiting three feet away. Instead of robbing the gas station because you can't pass a drug test to get a job, get checked into rehab for help. Instead of running from the law, just pay your court fees so we can get a little bit out of debt.

Keep The Truth- Words of advice for my father

Will you just lie to me
Tell me that everything will become better
Make me believe that one day I will change the world
Hold me in your arms and tell me how you have always tried you hardest for me
Stroke my hair and whisper tenderly
While you tell me you will always be there to help me when I need you
Call me every night and tell me that you hope I have wonderful dreams of what is to come
Just lie to me
Tell me that you were glad to know that I was expected
Express to me how elated you were to know that you could raise another beautiful soul
Tell me that you are so very proud of me, that u would change your every mistake to love me
No, just tell me you could never love me more than you do
Please lie to me
Tell me how you tell everyone that you do all that you can for me
Put it into my head that there is nothing else you would rather do then to know me
Convince me that I am the best thing that ever happened to you
You can keep the truth, I prefer from you
To Just lie to me

Okay, I wrote this poem for my father. Sadly, like most people, I was forced to be the product of a father who does know how to raise children. Who knows what I would be without my mother!

So Long TORRID

Well, my weekend was......I don't know. Saturday, I had to work at Torrid for eight hours because someone called in sick. I didn't mind since it was eight hours spent making money and staying out of trouble. Plus, it was the very last Saturday that the store would be open. The down side was that I didn't get to see my boyfriend until late that night when I got off, and then I had to be at work again on Sunday morning. I was looking forward for a chance to go to church Sunday morning, but I had to work another 8 hour shift. After work, my co-workers and I went to Red Lobster. It started off bad because we had to wait an hour and a half to get a table. Our district manager came to eat with us, she was cool. I was surprised that my store manager decided to pay for all of us, but I sure did not complain. We had a good time reflecting on old times working together and saying goodbye. I am really going to miss them; we were kind of like a little family.

I hate that my boyfriend and I didn't get to do much this weekend, but I didn't mind since my very first real job was shut down this weekend. It feels so weird knowing that I don't have to work at all this weekend. I have worked every weekend (except for one) for a year, and now, it's gone. I guess I have to go back to the drawing bored now. At least I do have my job on campus to keep myself sane. Don't worry, I'll find a new weekend job soon!

A Piece of Me

Grabbed by Reality

When all is down and all are dreaming
When the laughter stops and the jokes are a distance memory
I begin to float amongst the possibilities
I question my actions and revoke my mistakes
It’s a never ending journey
But a battle with winners
Will I come to and remain the same
Or will I finally make my inquiries into resolutions
As I wander all is dark but my thoughts are illuminated
I bounce off them one at a time
But I can’t remember what the last one was as I am tangent to the next
The last illuminated thought is extremely bright
It ‘s the thought of failure and the next, of disappointment
So I Halt
I let go, and I am grabbed, grabbed by reality
(copyright 08)

Okay, this poem is about how I feel when I'm laying in my bed trying to go to sleep. I have anxiety most nights, so it's always extremely hard for me to get to sleep. When I am in this state of mind, I feel just as I expressed in my poem. I feel like I know the things that I am capable of, and there are so many ideas that I have that I want to produce, until the thought of failure hits me. Then I get discouraged and realize that I don't want to risk failing. So I just shake it off, and try to forget about it, but I never do.

My Dorm Room Vs. His Apartment

My boyfriend moved into his first apartment in august, just before I moved on campus. For some strange reason, he thinks they are totally different. I know they are kind of, but he goes over board. He makes it seem as though I have zero responsibilities and I got it easy. Living on campus is expensive. Some may argue that it is cheaper than apartment and I do agree. I did not have to buy furniture, or pay rent every month. I still buy groceries for my room and I did have to buy a refrigerator. He argues that he has to pay a lot more than me for food. How? We are both only purchasing food for one person, and actually I should spend more because I’m in my room more than he is in his apartment. His two full time jobs keep him very busy, so why would he fill up his fridge with hundreds of dollars of food? Then every time I tell him I have to clean my room and it takes me a while, he laughs. "How long could it take you to just clean that space?" What!? Can he be serious? The TV gets dusty, and so does everything else in my room. Then there are mirrors that have to be cleaned, and I have to vacum. All of that doesn't include my clothes that I SOMETIMES have lying around. I do have a roommate, but we take turns cleaning, we don't share the task at the same time. I understand that rent and utilities cost him more, but there is still the same responsibility.

Minimum Wage and Living Wage: The Beginning

I always hear about people who have rent and house notes to pay that are usually the same or more than what they are getting paid. On top of their rent or house note, there are other bills that they have to pay as well, such as gas, lights, and water. How is a person supposed to be able to provide in such cases as this? How can some one making a little more than minimum wage afford the costs of living? Why is it that different states in the same country have different living wages? Why do we have different minimum wages? Once people do work hard and receive their pay checks, the taxes take out such a large chuck that the people are still not getting the money that they have worked for. Why doesn't everyone get the benefits of the raising of minimum wage? Like some may remember, with my job others got paid more than me for the same job and experience just because they were hired at the same time minimum wage was being adjusted, but my pay did not change. So the other people got paid more than I did, even after I clearly made more money than them for the company and I was there for a longer period of time.
As you can see, there are a lot of things that I do not understand about minimum wage or living wage, but I hope to research them and learn more.

Dealing With Differences

This semester is completely different from last semester. I actually have more classes than I had and I have decided to take on a new job as well. So my days are not spent being as lazy as I was. Last semester I only had 12 hrs of classes a week, so after I was done with class, I would go to my room and just sleep, get up and some homework, and go back to sleep. It was fun at first until I began to feel like a bomb. No offense to other bums. If that's what you like then have at it. I just could not take it anymore. I would sleep so much, that my head would start hurting. (I know that sounds bad)



I had a job, but it was only on the weekends because I thought I would get to stressed working through the week and on the weekend while trying to keep up my grades. At the time, I was working at Torrid. It's a plus size clothing store in the Wolfchase Mall. It wasn't hard at all, in fact, I really enjoyed working there. A lot of the customers like me. Well the customers that didn't call me "skinny" and tell me I had no business working there. Well, this semester, I found out Torrid is closing on January 27.

For the past week and a half, I have been working as an office assistant in Clement Hall. It is completely different from Torrid. Everyone is sooooo quiet, and I'm at a little desk by myself. I'm not complaining, just pointing out the differences. Everyone at the job has been very nice to me, so it's cool. But my schedule is very different from last semester. Monday, Wednesday and Friday, I am out of my room from 11:30 until 4:30. Tuesday and Thursday, I am out from 8:00 until 4:30. My days now are so busy. I work 16 hrs and I'm in class for 15. I don't get as many naps as last semester, but I like it. I don't feel like that bum anymore, so that's nice. The good part about my work study job is that I'm able to get homework done, so when I get off, I'm free.

Also last semester, I did a lot of hanging out. At the time, my boyfriend and I were trying to adjust to a lot of new things at once. He began to work to full time jobs Monday- Friday, which means we could only see each on the weekends. It's okay now, but at the time it was driving us crazy. I was so use to seeing him all the time, and then it was all different. I was just starting college, just beginning to live on my own on campus, and he had just got his own apartment and working his new job. It was a very stressful time for us. So we broke up a few times, but it never lasted long. I thought it was time for me to "test the waters" and it sucked. I compared every person that wanted to date me to him and they just could not compare. But because of my stubbornness, I still did not call him. He always called me though. Of course. Hope he never gets hold of this!

As of now, he and I are doing well. We have gotten use to our busy schedules and we just appreciate the time we are able to spend with each other. We celebrated our one year on August 15, 2007. I can not believe that I have actually maintained a relationship for over a year. I never thought it could be possible for me. When he brought it to my attention that our one year was less than 2 months away, I instantly felt like running out of Cracker Barrel. (That's one of the best restaurants for those who don't know.) I realized I wouldn't have a ride home, so I had to stay. I honestly have no clue how he managed to keep us together all of this time, because I usually have no problem breaking up with someone and moving on. My past relationships always seem to strangely end right before the one year deadline if you know what I mean. Not that I have had many relationships. Throughout my life, I have only had 3 serious relationships, and I am currently with my third. If he plays his cards right, it will be my last. Enough for now, I have to save something about me for my future blogs.......